Content Note: Please be aware that this blog post contains descriptions of abuse that readers may find distressing. If Lucy’s story resonates, you can find relevant links and contact details for organisations who can offer advice and support at the end of this blog post.
While this blog does explore a divorce case from the 19th century, it isn’t a normal post from us. Writing with our project partners Welsh Women’s Aid, we will be examining the 1894 divorce petition of Lucy Gregory, the wife of a clergyman from Hampstead, who experienced multiple forms of abuse during her four-year marriage. Her story highlights that domestic abuse is an age-old problem, that it can happen to anyone, that it happens in public and in private, and that it occurs all year round. The framework that Lucy was forced to operate within did not provide her with the vocabulary to describe the abuse she faced at the hand of her husband as anything other than ‘cruelty’, but, as we will explain, that does not mean she did not experience what we would today recognise as physical, sexual, and psychological abuse, and coercive control. As with so many living in abusive relationships today, the festive period was particularly difficult for Lucy, but it was far from unusual. If any of Lucy’s story resonates, or you have been affected by the contents of this blog post, you will find relevant links and contact information for organisations who can offer advice and support at the bottom of the page.
On Christmas Day 1893, Mrs Lucy Gregory was walking with her husband, the Reverend William Herbert Gregory, when he pushed her onto a footpath covered in snow. William refused to help her get up from the pavement and, according to Lucy’s testimony, he ‘…told her to lie there and die.’. Perhaps after reflecting on her experiences at what should have been a joyful time of year, on 8 May 1894, Lucy’s solicitor filed her divorce petition at the Principal Registry in London, on the grounds of her husband’s adultery and cruelty. We would know nothing of this incident, nor of the extensive catalogue of physical, sexual and psychological abuse William inflicted on Lucy throughout their marriage, if she hadn’t pursued a divorce. Within her petition she recounts the incident that had happened on Christmas Day, along with six pages – and over 30 individual instances – of abuse that William inflicted throughout the four years of their marriage.
Lucy and Willam married on 20 March 1889 at All Saints Church, in Southport, in the Couty of Lancaster. Within a month, William had physically assaulted Lucy, having ‘…boxed your Petitioners [Lucy’s] Ears.’ The abuse quickly escalated and by September that year, ‘…the assaults blows and kicks…were administered but they were inflicted every day during this month without intermission and Respondent [William] frequently assaulted Petitioner [Lucy] more than once in one day.’ The abuse that Lucy described was relentless, and was significantly more intense in private spaces, such as the marital home.
As a Clerk in Holy Orders, Lucy’s husband the Reverend William Herbert Gregory appeared to be concerned with his public persona and appearances of respectability. The Globe newspaper reported on the case on 30 January 1895 and noted how after Lucy left William and started divorce proceedings ‘…he begged her not to let them publish their grievances to the world.’ William then proceeded to threaten her and alluded to the damage to her reputation saying that ‘…he would have his turn [in the courtroom], and she would not come out unscathed.’ The contrast in William’s public and private persona is evident in the pages of Lucy’s testimony.
While the behaviours we now recognise as ‘coercive control’ were still more than 120 years from being recognised as a crime, the late nineteenth-century legal system did recognise the harms caused by physical abuse (albeit using a threshold of proof deeply uncomfortable to a modern reader). The physical assaults Lucy described happening outside the home, like that on Christmas Day, usually saw her pushed to the ground but, in another instance, William hit her head against a brick wall while she was walking to church. In contrast, the physical assaults that she described in the private space of the marital home often alluded to their sexual nature. She frequently mentioned the bed and bedroom as locations where the abuse occurred and specifically noted the state of undress she and William were in at the time, even including descriptions of him ripping her clothes off. Reports of marital rape were not explicitly made in the divorce petitions of our sample because it wasn’t recognised as a legal offence until the case of R v R (1991). A century earlier however, and it was deemed that a wife gave consent to a physical relationship as part of her wedding vows and such consent could not be withdrawn within marriage. That said, attempting sexual intercourse while a wife who was ill could be deemed injurious to her health, and Lucy did recount one incident in January 1891, when she ‘…was ill and because she refused to allow the said William Herbert Gregory to exercise his marital rights before she had recovered from such illness’. His response was to climb on top of Lucy while she was in bed and beat her with his hand and with the pillow.
Lucy and William Gregory were married for just under four years and Lucy’s petition details the near constant abuse she faced, whether physical, sexual, or psychological. This was, however, insufficient grounds to meet the stringent requirements for a full divorce at the time, as the Matrimonial Causes Act 1857 required that Lucy also prove William had committed adultery. This was, thankfully for Lucy, relatively straightforward as William had been engaged in a physical relationship with a servant (though it should be noted that this itself raises some important issues surrounding consent, power, and coercive control). A newspaper report on the case in the Worcestershire Chronicle on 2 February 1895 noted how another former servant, Margaret Davis, who acted as a witness for Lucy, said William had ‘…attempted to take liberties with her.’ As a result of his sexual indiscretions William contracted a venereal disease which he passed on to Lucy, causing physical injury and suffering. This was recognised by the Divorce Court as a form of cruelty, although wives citing this behaviour were often required to submit to intimate medical examinations to prove their claim. These are just a few of the many instances of abuse that Lucy recounted in her petition for divorce, but they give an idea of the extent of suffering that she endured during her marriage to William.
On 31 May 1894, William replied to the allegations that Lucy had made in her divorce petition, and he denied all the allegations of adultery and cruelty. Newspaper reports on the case show that Lucy had witnesses who gave evidence to the Divorce Court, including servants and neighbours who had heard or witnessed the arguments and abuse. This highlights the importance and potential power that servants and neighbours had, and it appears their testimony helped, and Lucy’s version of events were upheld. On 31 January 1895, the Judge presiding over the case, The Right Honourable Lord Justice Lopes awarded Lucy the decree nisi that she was seeking. Six months later (the mandatory waiting period between the stages of divorce) on 12 August 1895, the decree absolute was granted, and Lucy was finally legally free from the marriage and abuse that she had endured.
What happened in the aftermath of the divorce? There had been no children of the marriage, so child custody was not relevant in this particular case. Within two years William had moved across the country to live in Aylesbury, and married a woman called Violet in 1896, the daughter of a wealthy solicitor. They had two children together, and at the time of the 1901 census William’s occupation was recorded as ‘Retired Clergyman Church of England’. Whether he retired voluntarily at the age of 42, or lost his job due to the scandal surrounding the divorce from Lucy is unknown. But we do know that he died only two years later, leaving his new wife a widow. In contrast, Lucy did not marry again and instead spent the remaining years of her life living with friends and family in Southport and later in Bournemouth.
Whilst Lucy’s story took place 130 years ago, the violence and abuse that she was subjected to is still a regular occurrence for many women across the world. As in Lucy’s experience, it is often friends, colleagues and acquaintances who are able to provide vital insight into abuses which occur in public and private spaces. Now, like then, the recognition that abuse is unacceptable, the willingness to break the silence and help hold perpetrators to account cannot be underestimated. What has changed is the amount of protections that exist in law and the specialist support that is available to survivors. Our project partners, Welsh Women’s Aid, are proud to support and represent a network of 21 specialist services across Wales who use their knowledge and expertise to help survivors affected by violence against women, domestic abuse and sexual violence. We would all wish Christmas to be a time of joy and celebration for families, but sadly this is not the case for everyone. Support services are likely to see a substantial increase in requests for support from survivors in January, often after having made extra efforts to keep their families safe over Christmas. In January 2024, compared to December 2023, the Live Fear Free Helpline experienced an increase in overall contact (both incoming and outgoing) by 17%, and an increase of 18% in the total incoming contacts (incoming calls, texts, webchats, emails and voicemails). In the same period there was also an increase of 19% in refuge referrals, an increase of 25% in contacts signposted to housing services, an increase of 21% in contacts signposted to the police, an increase of 81% in contacts signposted to social services and an increase of 23% in those signposted to counselling services. By supporting Welsh Women’s Aid or your local support service, we are hopeful that together we can continue to make a real difference to the lives of thousands of survivors like Lucy all over the United Kingdom.
If you’ve been affected by any of the content in this blog you can seek support from the following organisations:
- Our project partners, Welsh Women’s Aid, run The Live Fear Free Helpline (funded by the Welsh Government and run by Welsh Women’s Aid) a confidential, freephone support and information service open 24 hours, 7 days a week, 365 days a year for anyone experiencing domestic abuse, sexual violence or any other form of violence against women in Wales. You can find more information here: https://welshwomensaid.org.uk/about/contact/ or call the helpline on 0808 80 10 800.
- Women’s Aid in England run a Live Chat service between 8am-6pm weekdays and 10am-6pm on weekends, along with other online services and the UK Domestic Abuse Directory for your local domestic abuse service at www.womensaid.org.uk
- Women’s Aid Scotland have a 24-hour Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline on 0800 027 1234 email helpline@sdafmh.org.uk or visit https://www.sdafmh.org.uk Message the text/WhatsApp service on 07401 288 595. You can find more information here: https://womensaid.scot/contact-us/
- Women’s Aid Northern Ireland run a Domestic and Sexual Abuse Helpline https://dsahelpline.org/ You can find more information here: https://www.womensaidni.org/about/contact-us/
- The National Domestic Abuse Helpline is 0808 2000 247 (run by Refuge).
- The Men’s Advice Line, for male domestic abuse survivors is 0808 801 0327 (run by Respect).
- The National LGBT+ Domestic Abuse Helpline is 0800 999 5428 (run by Galop).
- If you are in immediate danger, always call 999.
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